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99 Luft-Word-Balloons
Database

Level

Level 44

Release Date

September 5, 2014

Number of Quests

3

Preceded By

Seeking A Friend For The End Of This Update

Succeeded By

Bloatation Device

99 Luft-Word-Balloons is the second to last part of the Level 44 update.

QuestsEdit

Quest Requirements Triggered By Time
99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 1 Make Springfielders Tap Away their Thoughts (x15)
Make Homer Tap Away his Thoughts
Make Database Bask in his Achievement
Homer 16h
99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 2 Make Bart Skateboard (x3) Homer 12h(4hx3)
99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 3 Make Database Meditate Homer 12h

DialogueEdit

99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 1Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "Hey, what's going on? How come I can read me saying, “Hey, what's going on?”
Moe Icon "I can read what you said too, Homer."
"And I can read what I'm saying right now! That means, youz alls can read my speak-a-ma-goos."
"If a bartender can't curse out patrons under his breath, his mind will snap like a twig."
Database Icon "Don't be afraid."
"I've just hacked the code of our universe - which is definitely a real thing - to show all of you exactly what you say."
Homer Icon "SHUUUUUUUHB?!"
Database Icon "Exactly!"
"Abstract guttural noises. Nonsense phrases doubling as slang. Strained pop culture references."
"Now do you see how much pointless speech fills your lives?!"
Moe Icon "I've always known that. But you don't see me being a jerk about it."
Database Icon "Self-awareness may be painful, but it's also an opportunity to grow."
"Having to see and read what we say will force us to confront how we treat each other. This will spur us on to improve ourselves."
Lisa Icon "Counterpoint: Texting."
Quimby Icon "I'm not sure Springfield has enough room for these yap yap bubbles. The town's borders are, ahm, a tad inflexible."
"And now that you know I know, please stop sending me comments about it."
Database Icon "Oh, just tap on what's said and you can send it away—"
Homer Icon "Tap!"
"Ooooooo!"
"Now how do I get rid of the “Ooooooo”?"
"Uh… what's it that I gotta do again?"

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Database Icon "I feel honored people are--"
Homer Icon "Tap."
Database Icon "People are enjoying what I—"
Homer Icon "Tap."
Database Icon "Made. The greatest achievement is the joy—"
Homer Icon "Tap."
Database Icon "Oh lord, what have I—"
Homer Icon "Tap."

99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 2Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "Tap."
"Tap."
"Tap."
"Tap."
"Tap."
"Hmmm."
"Tap."
"Tap."
"ZZZ…tap…ZZZ"
"Tap."
Marge Icon "Homer, everyone in town can—"
Homer Icon "Tap."
Marge Icon "Homer!"
Homer Icon "Marge, sweetie, that was an accident. I, of course, wanted to hear the entirety of your worried nagging."
Moe Icon "Hey yammer bags, clamp those lips, or I will staple gun them shut!"
Homer Icon "I'm trying to. But every time I get rid of these speechy thingums, another one takes its place."
"Tap."
"SEE!"
"Tap."
"D'oh!"
Lisa Icon "Before you get caught in a loop, Dad, might I advise you to just tap silently."
"Then the word “tap” won't appear, needing you to tap it."
Homer Icon "Got it. Thanks, Lisa."
"Tap."
"I tried."
Bart Icon "Why do any of you read all these stupid letter jumbles we barf?"
"If they're annoying you, I'll show you how to deal with them."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "Every time I say this I'm incredulous, but Bart's right."
"We should go out and be active and live our lives instead of commenting on them."
Marge Icon "That may be true. I know I have more important things to do."
"But I feel bad ignoring all this dialog. People put a lot of time into it--"
Homer Icon "Tap."
"D'oh!"
"Yeah, I really gotta start doing something better with my time."

99 Luft-Word-Balloons Pt. 3Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "gldfhklfkj" *hiccup*
Professor Frink Icon "ylkv%#fr" *hiccup*
Herman Icon "ylkv%#fr" *hiccup*
Mr. Burns Icon "$$$$$$" *vomit*
Database Icon "How come everyone is making even less sense than usual?"
Lisa Icon "Exhausted by having to constantly reflect on their words, most have sought refuge in the incoherency of alcohol."
Database Icon "Lisa, I'm not sure you're any more central than you were before, if you still only say exposition."
Lisa Icon "Yeah, well now I say a lot more of it. So there."
Database Icon "If what you say is true, no one can claim they're too busy to spend quality time with me."
"Who wants to play a board game where we compete to determine price earnings ratio for the 15th century Hanseatic League?"
Lisa Icon "I'm afraid that answer will undoubtedly be no one."
Professor Frink Icon "Except me, of course, but only if I get to be Lübeck. Love me some Lübeck."
Lisa Icon "Don't you get it?"
"You can't get people to want to quote unquote ‘hang' with you by making the rest of their lives worse."
Database Icon "But how they now experience the world is how I do all the time!"
Lisa Icon "SHUUUUUUUHB?!"
"Ugh, did I just say “SHUUUUUUUHB?!”? I'm becoming more like my father every day."
Database Icon "I'm very well aware that everything I do, even the very sound of my voice, is a nerd cliché."
"It's like I was designed by a team of self-loathing losers as an effigy of all the things they hated about themselves as kids."
"As if they could expunge their pasts by watching me be burned in flames of youthful humiliation."
"Ugh, who says such things? I can't take being exposed to such thoughts any longer."
"It's time I joined these drooling, oblivious morlocks."
Homer Icon "Schlerffftttp!"
Martin Icon "No, you can't!"
"Primo, you're underage. Secunda, your brain is a gift."
Lisa Icon "Database, you've shown your intelligence has the power to change the world."
"You just need to learn how to harness that ability to improve the lives of others."
Professor Frink Icon "Or at least entertain them at a moderately successful rate. Like 63%."
"Maybe 42% after you've built up enough good will."
Martin Icon "I, for one, would be glad to join you on your journey toward fulfillment. If you would have me, Superfriend."
Database Icon "Aw."
Lisa Icon "To begin such a journey, I recommend following a spiritual practice to gain control over your emotions."
"You never hear of the Dalai Lama getting in a bar fight, do you?"

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "By the way, I know most of what I just said was exposition. But I said it to help you."
"So don't sass off about it."

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