Make Buck McCoy Give Cowboy Speech Lessons Make Celebrities Talk Like a Cowboy (x3)
8h 8h
100 10
Buck McCoy
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 4
Make Buck McCoy Demonstrate Lasso Skills Make Celebrities Turn Lassos Into Tangled Messes (x3)
4h 4h
100 10
Buck McCoy
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 5
Make Buck McCoy Demonstrate Extreme Marksmanship Make Krusty Accidentally Shoot Buck McCoy Make Celebrities Point Cool Guns at Things (x3) (Exclude Krusty)
60m 60m 60m
100 10
Buck McCoy
Dialogue[]
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 1[]
Start[]
Character
Dialogue
It's Buck McCoy, the greatest movie cowboy of them all!
Howdy, little pardner. If you could just point me in the direction of my house.... I seem to have misplaced it.
Yeah, thing is, your house isn't in this update. Maybe sometime in the future!
What in tarnation is an “update?” And I ain't never heard of “the future” neither.
Fortunately there's an old cowboy trick for findin' out what's really going on.
All Objectives Started[]
Character
Dialogue
Buck, baby! Always good to hear from Hollywood royalty. How's alcohol rehab?
They kicked me out. I sent Frank the Wonder Horse on one too many liquor store runs.
Listen, I know this is a story you've heard a million times from down-on-their-luck actors, but...
...an irresponsible video game company neglected to include my house in an update. I need some fast money.
Let me make a few calls and get right back to you.
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 2[]
Character
Dialogue
Great news, Buck. Hollywood is just gaga to employ eighty-something-year-old actors in all their tent-pole films.
I feel sorry for all them gorgeous twenty-year-old actors. They'll never catch a break.
Plus, we're in the middle of a real western craze.
You can thank the boffo box office of mega-hits like “The Lone Ranger,” “Jonah Hex,” and “Cowboys and Aliens.”
They want you on the set of the latest sure-fire western mega-hit right away!
You're going to teach the actors how to ride, lasso and be authentic fake cowboys.
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 3[]
Character
Dialogue
Let's see how you fellers are doin' on yer cowboy accents.
Repeat after me: “Y'all better mosey on outta here if ya know what's good fer ya.”
You had all better this that and de other thing. Baby.
Even for a first try, that was awful. Try just the first word: “y'all.”
You all. Baby.
Where you from, cowpoke?
Austria.
Well, I ain't never been to Austria, Texas. But they sure teach lousy English there.
How's this, Buck: “Hey hey, y'all!”
Are you wearing makeup? Cowboys don't.
The look is non-negotiable.
But don't worry. They paid a couple of Harvard kids $5 million to write a backstory that explains the whole “clown gunslinger” thing.
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 4[]
Character
Dialogue
Let's focus on the deadliest, most cold-blooded cowboy skill.
I'm talking, of course, about making a lasso go round while you hop through it, smilin' and singin'.
The smile's the key. Famed gunslinger Pistol Sanderson once killed ten U.S. Marshals with a perfectly-timed lasso smile.
Lasso? The tech guys said we could CGI the rope in later. I'll be in my trailer.
You mention CGI again, and I'll lasso-smile you dead where you stand.
Buck in the Saddle Again Pt. 5[]
Start[]
Character
Dialogue
Dang it, I'll make cowboys of you city slickers yet.
Lesson three: how to win a gal by showing you can spit tobacc-y farther than the other fellas.
Come on! I wanna shoot something already!
Baby steps. You ain't even learned to ride a horse while standing on your head.
I agree with clown. The time for shoot is now.
Fine. We'll start with something easy -- shooting the wings off a june bug at fifty paces. Go!
All Objectives Started[]
Character
Dialogue
You shot me!
Don't worry. There's an intern from Emerson we can pin the blame on.
Elizabeth? Be a dear and put your fingerprints on this trigger?
End[]
Character
Dialogue
I don't think this is for me. The movie stars of today are selfish, lazy and entitled.
In the Golden Age of Hollywood, we were all the things a man should be: drunk, misogynistic and mildly racist.