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God Bless Native America
Tribal Chief

Event

Thanksgiving Event (2013)

Release Date

November 15, 2013

Number of Quests

10

God Bless Native America is a quest from the Thanksgiving 2013 Event featuring the Tribal Chief. Caesar's Pow-Wow Casino is required to start this quest.

QuestsEdit

Quest Requirements Time
God Bless Native America Pt. 1 Make Tribal Chief Learn About Springfield's Culture
Make Homer Teach About Springfield's Culture
12h
God Bless Native America Pt. 2 Make Tribal Chief Hand Out Expired Vouchers 24h
God Bless Native America Pt. 3 Make Lisa Visit the Kwik-E-Mart
Make Tribal Chief Visit the Kwik-E-Mart
60m
God Bless Native America Pt. 4 Make Lisa Visit Android's Dungeon
Make Tribal Chief Visit Android's Dungeon
8h
God Bless Native America Pt. 5 Make Lisa Visit Moe's Tavern
Make Tribal Chief Visit Moe’s Tavern
3h
God Bless Native America Pt. 6 Make Tribal Chief Embark on a Vision Quest 8h
God Bless Native America Pt. 7 Make Wiggum Have Fun at the Native Casino 24h
God Bless Native America Pt. 8 Make Lisa Fret About Native American Relations
Make Homer Fret About Native American Relations
6h
God Bless Native America Pt. 9 Make Tribal Chief Attend a Corporate Meeting
Make Lisa Attend a Corporate Meeting
4h
God Bless Native America Pt. 10 Make Springfielders ‘Live it up’ at the Native Casino (x10) 12h

DialogueEdit

God Bless Native America Pt. 1Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Tribal Chief Icon "Excuse me sir, is this Springfield?"
Cletus Icon "U-huh... You new? I ain't never seen your kind 'round here 'fore."
"Fancy tie, suede jacket... I KNOWS! Y'allz one of dem preem-yam characters I'z been hearin' 'bout!"
Homer Icon "Oh just ignore him, he's the local yokel - one of many beloved American stereotypes."
"Speaking of stereotypes, you must be here to help celebrate this year's Thanksgiving?"
Tribal Chief Icon "No, actually I'm here on business. I run the new casino and would like to learn a little bit about Springfield."
Homer Icon "A Native American opening a casino, eh? No stereotypes that I can see there."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "So that's everything there is to know about our little town!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Hmmm... that took far less time then I'd anticipated."
Lisa Icon "Yes. Like most colonial towns, Springfield stole the staggering majority of its cultural heritage from other people."
Homer Icon "Except the Harlem Shake! We invented that."

God Bless Native America Pt. 2Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "I'm really excited to see Native America finally represented in our town Chief!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Thank you Lisa, it's nice to feel welcome in spite of my current price point."
"Speaking of money, would you like to help me get started on my mission to break down the walls of cultural insensitivity and ignorance?
Lisa Icon "I'd love to! What would you like me to do? Hand out pamphlets? Organize protests? Burn an effigy? I've always wanted to burn an eggify."
Tribal Chief Icon "No, no. Nothing quite so involved. I just need an unpaid volunteer to help me deliver Casino Vouchers."
Lisa Icon "...for some kind of a unification ceremony?"
Tribal Chief Icon "No, to advertise the casino. Social Security checks come today, and I want to fleece the oldies before they have time to deposit their money."
Lisa Icon *sigh* "I'm trying to like you, but you're not making it easy."

God Bless Native America Pt. 3Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "I think it would be a great idea for you to say hello to some of the local business owners."
"They hold a lot of clout over what goes on in Springfield."
Tribal Chief Icon "Did I just hear a gun go off inside that convenience store?"
Lisa Icon "I wish I could say no."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Apu Icon "If it isn't Lisa Simpson. It is good to see you again! Please forgive the bullet holes. We're, uh... re-decorating. With holes."
"And who is your middle-aged friend?"
Lisa Icon "This is Chief... Um... I'm so sorry! I just realized I don't know your name!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Just call me Chief. It got too hard for my tribe to think of decent names after a while."
"Just ask my brother Bad Smelling Wind. Or my cousin Really Bad Smelling Wind."
Apu Icon "Wow! A native tribe and its casino in Springfield! How exciting! This is the most excellent news!"
Tribal Chief Icon "It pleases me that you feel so warmly towards native Americans."
Apu Icon "Anything to get these racist crackers off my back."

God Bless Native America Pt. 4Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "I'm sorry about all these terrible jokes Chief. You're not really getting the writers when they're at their best. Kind of dregs, really."
"Speaking of dregs, let me introduce you to Comic Book Guy."
Comic Book Guy Icon "On behalf of my people: The Nation of Obese Nerds of Comic Book Reatail, I welcome you to Springfield!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Thank you...?"
Comic Book Guy Icon "I have learned much of your people's struggle from the countless minor comic book characters of native origin."
"This includes Captain Tomahawk, Mohawk Man, The Pow Wow Puncher and my personal favorite, Firewater Man."
"It would be my honor if you were to join a brief 'Q & A' gathering inside my shop."

God Bless Native America Pt. 5Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "Wow... that was awkward."
Tribal Chief Icon "That place smelled worse than the sweatiest sweat lodge."
Lisa Icon "Maybe we should visit someone a little less entertaining next."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "Chief, meet Moe Szyslak. Moe, the Chief is a manager of a Native Casino that's just moved into town."
Moe Icon "Well, I guess I'll finally have to stop organizing illicit after-hours poker games at the bar."
Tribal Chief Icon "Oh don't worry, we're not here to compete with your illegal business."
Moe Icon "Oh I ain't worried, I still go the panda smuggling. People love the panda smuggling. They buy em as fast I can smuggle em. Panda, panda, panda... smuggle, smuggle, smuggle..."
Tribal Chief Icon "You are truly a monster."
Moe Icon "Yeah."

God Bless Native America Pt. 6Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "I'm so embarrassed by this town."
"You must think Springfield is the most backward place in the world."
Tribal Chief Icon "It could be worse."
Lisa Icon "How so?"
Tribal Chief Icon "No idea. Just making conversation."
"Honestly, I would do anything to leave this place right now."
Lisa Icon "Unfortunately there are no roads leading out of town. You can't build them that way here."
Tribal Chief Icon "They can trap my body, but they can't trap my mind."

God Bless Native America Pt. 7Edit

Character Dialogue
Wiggum Icon "Sir! Is that your Casino parked over there?"
Tribal Chief Icon "Yes. Yes it is. Why do you ask?"
Wiggum Icon "May I see you license, registration and a certificate of insurance?"
Tribal Chief Icon "I have only just arrived in town. I'm afraid I don't have any of those things."
Wiggum Icon "In that case you should know you're contravening the Springfield Gaming and Gambling statute."
"Specifically you're in violation of section 3, subsection 8 paragraph 391."
"And yes, I did memorize that bit of the law just in case an unlicensed native casino arrived in town unexpectedly."
Tribal Chief Icon "Typical. I've only just arrived and already I'm being harassed by cops."
Wiggum Icon "Tell you what, I'll hold off on giving you a citation. But I will need to inspect the premise for any, errr... illegal activity."

God Bless Native America Pt. 8Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "Dad, I’m worried the Chief doesn't like it here in Springfield and wants to leave."
Homer Icon "Oh Lisa. The Chief is now as much part of this town as you and I are. Where’s he gonna go? Clash of Clans? I don’t think so."
Lisa Icon "What if he just doesn't’t like us and decides to embark on an objective that has no end date..."
Homer Icon "Wow... scary."
Lisa Icon "And what if that endless objective can’t be rushed with donuts?!"
Homer Icon "Hold me Lisa!"

God Bless Native America Pt. 9Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "Lisa – I had a vision quest! Matthew Modine fell in love with Linda Fiorentino."
Lisa Icon "I think you just saw the movie “Vision Quest”.
Homer Icon "In the movie does Matthew Modine have super powers including super-stretching and super-strength and invisibility and sometimes flying? And is Linda Fiorentino a talking frog?
Lisa Icon "Maybe you did have a vision quest."
Homer Icon "What does it mean?"
Lisa Icon "I think we need to talk to the chief before he leaves town!!!"

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Tribal Chief Icon "...as this graph indicates, during the last quarter our video lottery terminal profits soared like an eagle!"
Lisa Icon "I’m sorry to interrupt your meeting!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Why, if it isn’t little Lisa Simpson….How unexpected that I should see you in the middle of a hastily scheduled quarterly investor call..."
Lisa Icon "I just wanted to make sure you didn’t leave without considering everything the town has to offer to you and your tribe!"
Tribal Chief Icon "Leave? But Lisa, I would never leave a town that had a person like you in it."
Lisa Icon "Really? Thank you. But why me?"
Tribal Chief Icon "Because unlike the rest of the dolts in this town, you have a future. You will grow up to do something great, and no doubt make a fortune. And then you will visit the casino and we will get a large chunk of that fortune from you."
Homer Icon "WOO HOO! The Chief is staying!"
Lisa Icon *sigh* "Chief, I’m still having trouble liking you."

God Bless Native America Pt. 10Edit

Character Dialogue
Lisa Icon "So all this talk about lifting Springfield out of its cultural poverty wasn’t true?"
Tribal Chief Icon "I think you misunderstood Lisa. The fact that my business is doing so well is proof that our efforts here have been fruitful!"
Lisa Icon "I’m not sure I’d call ‘Living it up at the Casino’ a real cultural exchange….When you think about it, casinos are actually a regressive tax on the disadvantaged. Money is extracted from the poorest and most vulnerable of the community with little contribution to the local tax base because all the profits go to the tribe."
Tribal Chief Icon "You can go now. Be sure to tell everyone in town: “For great good, terrific shows, and gaming action, be sure to visit Caesar’s Pow Wow Casino!”"