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Old Gray Marriage
Old Jewish Man Sidebar

Level

57

Release Date

September 3, 2015

Number of Quests

7+1

Premium Side Quests

Grumpy Grumpy Grampos

Preceded By

A Drop in the Bucket

Succeeded By

Frankie the Politician

Old Gray Marriage is the main questline for the Level 57 content update that was released on September 3, 2015.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 1 Build Overpass Diner
Make Simpsons Family Dine at the Overpass Diner (x5)
24h
60m
Cash100
XP10
Homer
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 2 Make Old Jewish Man Change Rooms in the Retirement Castle 24h Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 3 Make Old Jewish Man Sort Through Pills 8h Cash100
XP10
Homer
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 4 Build Shotgun Pete's
Make Grampa Get Gay Married to Old Jewish Man
24h
12h
Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 5 Make Old Jewish Man Drop Pants for Change
Make Grampa Sit in the Kitchen
4h
4h
Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 6 Make Grampa and Old Jewish Man Get Divorced 24h Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man
Old Gray Marriage Pt. 7 Make Old Jewish Man Move Into The Retirement Castle 24h Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man
The Quest Grumpy Grumpy Grampos starts
Geriatric Medicine Build Center for Geriatric Medicine
Make Old Jewish Man Retrieve a Box of Pills
Make Jasper Retrieve a Box of Pills (If the player has him)
24h
10h
10h
Cash100
XP10
Old Jewish Man

DialogueEdit

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 1 Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Happy Icon "Happy Birthday, Dad!"
Grampa Icon "Another year has passed? Hot diggity! Take that, Death, my team of doctors, that fortune teller, and all sense of reason!"
Homer Icon "And to celebrate we're taking you someplace special."
Grampa Surprised Icon "Last time you said that you took me to the Retirement Castle. And the time before that, you mugged me and left me in the woods."
Homer Icon "I left you in the woods and THEN you got mugged. But this time, we're really taking you out for real. With all that money we got from mugging you."
Grampa Icon "So where are we going? The Gilded Truffle? El Chemistri?"
Homer Icon "Even better - a greasy roadside diner! Wait, did I say better? I meant much worse."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "Look dad, it's your friend... the crazy old guy."
Grampa Icon "Who? Jasper Beardly? Hans Moleman?"
Homer Icon "No, the other one. The one who isn't quite important enough to warrant having a name."
Grampa Surprised Icon "Why! I haven't seen you around for ages. I assumed you died!"
Old Jewish Man Icon "Technically I did... several times! But it takes more than a couple strokes to stop Ol' What's-My-Name!"

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 2 Edit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Sad Icon "I have to admit I've been lonely ever since my wife passed on. Sometimes I just walk around in her heels and pearls."
Grampa Icon "To keep her memory alive?"
Old Jewish Man Icon "Sure, let's go with that."
Grampa Icon "Why don't you move in with me? It'll cure your loneliness, and I'll have someone to wake me from my night terrors."
Old Jewish Man Happy Icon "Good idea! Us old fogeys gotta stick together -- we're a dying breed you know!"

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 3 Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Icon "So Dad, for the rest of your birthday I thought I'd take you to the movies. Or just go to the movies myself using your senior discount and let you sit in the car."
Grampa Icon "No can do, sonny, I've got plans tonight."
Old Jewish Man Icon "Yeah, Abe and I are going to the drive-in. We'll see a movie AND sit in a parked car."
Grampa Icon "We're a regular Odd Couple. He's the old, deaf one with a bad memory."
Homer Icon "And which are you?"
Grampa Icon "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Old Jewish Man Icon "I've got a pill to help rememberin'! And a pill to help spice things up in the bedroom! And a pill to help find the bedroom!"

Jobs StartedEdit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Icon "This one's to keep my heart working. This one's to keep my liver functioning. These just keep me alive. Where are all my fun pills?"

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 4 Edit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Sad Icon "I can't find my Jammitin pills! Now I'll never be able to hold hands with a woman while sitting in separate outdoor bathtubs."
Grampa Icon "Keep your filthy fantasies to yourself! And even if you find your pills, where will you find a woman?"
Old Jewish Man Frustrated Icon "Hey! I've got women following me around everywhere! Helping me in and out of chairs, wearing white, giving me pudding."
Grampa Icon "Those are nurses, you idiot! And most of them are men."
Old Jewish Man Icon "Oy, I miss having a wife -- the conversation, the living together, the helping me out of bed at night to pee."
Grampa Icon "I do all those things."
Old Jewish Man Icon "And then there's the tax break."
Grampa Icon "Well, we don't have that... but maybe we could. You and I could get married!"
Old Jewish Man Surprised Icon "What?! You mean like a gay marriage?"
Grampa Icon "Why not! Gay guys have been fakin' straight marriages since the New Deal! We could be straight guys in a gay marriage!"

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Homer Confused Icon "My dad's marrying a man? On the one hand I should be sad because my entire childhood has been a lie."
Homer Dreamy Icon "But on the other hand, weddings mean cake!"
Bart Annoyed Icon "I'm fine with gay marriage, but OLD gay marriage? Yuck."

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 5 Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Icon "Now that we're married, I suppose one of us should be the breadwinner."
Grampa Icon "I'm banned from the Lucky Loaves bakery/casino since they caught me counting breadsticks, so it'll have to be you."
Old Jewish Man Icon "I guess I can dust off my old vaudeville act."
Old Jewish Man Icon "Probably should update a few references' how old's the Lindbergh baby these days?"
Grampa Icon "I'll be waiting here for when you come back! Gosh, it's nice to have someone to wait for other than death!"

EndEdit

Old Jewish Man can now perform his act on the Open Air Stage.
 
— In-Game Message


Old Gray Marriage Pt. 6 Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Annoyed Icon "These kids today are mean. The crowd pelted me with organic tomatoes. So plump and juicy, they really splat when they hit your face."
Grampa Icon "Well, did you bring any home? We're on a fixed income."
Old Jewish Man Icon "No but I did get the hot volunteer's phone number. She's getting slip bars installed in her hot tub."
Grampa Surprised Icon "What! I'm starting to think you aren't taking this sham marriage seriously!"
Old Jewish Man Frustrated Icon "I can't live like this! I'm going to say something I never thought I'd say – I want a divorce cobunkulous."
Old Jewish Man Icon "Oy, I think that last bit might have been a stroke."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Happy Icon "Single and ready to…"
Old Jewish Man Sleepy Icon "zzzzzzzzzzzzzz…"

Old Gray Marriage Pt. 7 Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Happy Icon "Abe! It's been forever! How's life been treating you?"
Grampa Icon "Can't complain! Except that I've been a little lonely. And I have what the doctors are calling super shingles."
Old Jewish Man Icon "I'm lonely myself. Got out of a relationship recently, I think."
Grampa Icon "Maybe we should move in together."
Old Jewish Man Icon "Or better yet, let's get married! The tax breaks would be a real boon."
Grampa Icon "What a great idea! I can't believe I've never thought of it before. Those savings will help pay for these bills I've been getting from a divorce lawyer."

Jobs StartedEdit

Character Dialogue
Jasper Icon "Does this sham marriage need a sham mistress?"
Take a look at the Community Center and find out what Jasper wants. Complete his quests to find out!
 
— In-Game Message


Geriatric Medicine Edit

Character Dialogue
Old Jewish Man Icon "Doc, you've got to help me start some tingle in my dingle. And stop the tingle in my bladder."
Dr. Hibbert Icon "You came to the right place! We've got pills for just about everything as long as it's not life threatening and you're not poor!"
Jasper Icon "Do you have something to stop the phantom pain in my wooden leg?"
Dr. Hibbert Icon "No but I've got some bees wax varnish that will give it a lovely shine."

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