Parental Guidance
Ling Bouvier Sidebar


Winter 2015 Event

Level Required


Release Date

January 2, 2016

Number of Quests


Parental Guidance is a premium limited time questline involving the character Ling Bouvier. It was released on January 2, 2016, during the Winter 2015 Event's Act 3.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
Parental Guidance Pt. 1 Make Selma Watch MacGyver
Make Ling Bouvier Stay with Family
12h Cash100
Ling Bouvier
Parental Guidance Pt. 2 Make Selma Take a Smoke Break
Make Ling Bouvier Paint a Masterpiece
Ling Bouvier
Parental Guidance Pt. 3 Make Selma Tamper with Records
Make Ling Bouvier Speak at a Pre-K Level
12h Cash100
Ling Bouvier
Parental Guidance Pt. 4 Make Ling Bouvier Perform Flutenastics 60m Cash100
Ling Bouvier
Parental Guidance Pt. 5 Make Selma Watch Ling All Night
Make Ling Bouvier Sleep Like an Angel
24h Cash100
Ling Bouvier

Dialogue Edit

Parental Guidance Pt. 1 Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Icon "Patty, do you ever open any mail besides sweepstakes entries?"
Selma Icon "Especially when there are letters from China telling us Madam Wu is coming to visit Ling!"
Selma Sad Icon "How dare they! They're checking to see if we're fit parents."
Selma Icon "Quick, let's drop Ling off at Marge's so we can smoke up these cartons of cigarettes and finish our 140 hour MacGyver marathon!"

Parental Guidance Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Happy Icon "Alright, the apartment is as clean as a cheap, smoker's apartment will ever get."
Selma Happy Icon "All Madam Wu will see is a creative space -- flash cards on the table, educational shows on TV, and painting supplies for our mini Matisse!"
Ling Bouvier Happy Icon "Color!"
Selma Sad Icon "No Ling. You're getting paint everywhere. I'll look like the horrible mother of a puny Jackson Pollock."
Ling Bouvier Happy Icon "Pretty walls!"
Selma Annoyed Icon "Uggh… I can't handle this without another Laramie Lady Long to my lips."

End Edit

Character Dialogue
MadamWu Icon "Ling is painting your walls, while you spread your smoke?"
Selma Sad Icon "No, no, it's not what it looks like. Ling was about to paint on canvas and I was exhaling my smoke into the fridge."

Parental Guidance Pt. 3 Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Annoyed Icon "Gahh the nerve of that woman to worry about the health and safety of my adopted child!"
Selma Happy Icon "I know how to get her off my back, I'll run down to the DMV and report her rental car as stolen!"
Ling Bouvier Happy Icon "Mama! Let's play game!"
Selma Annoyed Icon "Not now Ling, Mommy has to mess up a foreign visitor's life!"

Parental Guidance Pt. 4 Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Icon "If Madam Wu needs proof that I'm a good mother then I'll show her just how talented I've made Ling."
Ling Bouvier Sad Icon "Me tired Mama."
Selma Happy Icon "That's nice sweetie, but now it's time to practice being talented."

Parental Guidance Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Happy Icon "See how wonderful Ling is! She learned it all from me."
MadamWu Icon "All I see is a talented, very tired child."
Selma Sad Icon "I like the “talented” part but the “tired” thing doesn't sound positive. I can't lose Ling! She's made my life worth living!"

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Selma Sad Icon "Uh-oh, a letter from China. I don't know if I can stand to read what Madam Wu is going to say."
Patty Icon "Give it to me, I'll read it..."
Patty Icon "Gobblety-gook, gobblety-gook… “It is the agencies belief that Selma is taking sufficient care of Ling.”"
Patty Icon ""However, Selma appeared stressed and distracted. Perhaps Ling should be taking better care of her.""
Patty Happy Icon "Haha... *cough-cough*... haha... *cough-cough-cough*"
Selma Happy Icon "Haha... *cough-cough-cough*... haha... *cough*"