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The Bad Shepherd
The Parson Sidebar

Content Update

Winter 2016 Event

Level Required

5

Release Date

December 6, 2016

Number of Quests

5

The Bad Shepherd is a side questline that was released on December 6, 2016, for the Winter 2016 Event. It requires the character The Parson.

Quests Edit

Quest Requirements Time Reward Triggered By
The Bad Shepherd Pt. 1 Make the Parson Sermonize at Rev. Lovejoy 8h Cash100
XP10
The Parson
The Bad Shepherd Pt. 2 Make Rev. Lovejoy Advertise the Parson's Speech
Make the Parson Sermonize the Old Hits
Make Ned Notice His Moustache Tingle
60m
60m
60m
Cash100
XP10
The Parson
The Bad Shepherd Pt. 3 Make Lovejoy Advertise the Parson's Performance
Make the Parson Sing Psalm 98:5
Make Ned Notice His Moustache Tingle Again
12h
12h
12h
Cash100
XP10
The Parson
The Bad Shepherd Pt. 4 Make the Parson Tear it Up 4h Cash100
XP10
The Parson
The Bad Shepherd Pt. 5 Make the Parson Spread the Word 24h Cash100
XP10
The Parson

Dialogue Edit

The Bad Shepherd Pt. 1 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Rev. Lovejoy Surprised Icon Parson! To what do I owe this, uh, pleasure?
The Parson Icon Your former congregation walks the streets paying homage to river spirits and you wonder why I'm here?
Rev. Lovejoy Sad Icon I've tried, I really have!
The Parson Icon We in the Presbylutheran Church can stomach losing the occasional member to the Lutherterians.
The Parson Icon They're a heretical lot, doomed to hellfire, but, you know, I see the appeal. I get it.
The Parson Annoyed Icon But PAGANISM, Tim? Really?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Rev. Lovejoy Icon It's just a slump! I've had them before!
The Parson Annoyed Icon Your numbers are down for the twelfth straight quarter. That's not a slump. That's a one-way ticket to the Saskatoon parish.
The Parson Annoyed Icon Now, we're gonna fix this, or you can pack your bags.

The Bad Shepherd Pt. 2 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
The Parson Icon Timothy, gather your flock. I am going to address them personally.
Rev. Lovejoy Surprised Icon That's incredible! You haven't spoken publicly since 1983!
The Parson Sad Icon And I swore I never would again. The last time I sermonized, my words were so holy twelve old widows burst into flame.
The Parson Icon But the situation is dire. Time to play the old hits.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Ned Happy Icon That... that was incredible!
The Parson Annoyed Icon I wish the rest of the congregation agreed. Those pentagram-wearing weirdos just stared at me...
Rev. Lovejoy Icon See? I told you!
The Parson Icon I performed all my 80's hits: “God: Your Personal Yoda,” “LPs are the Old Testament, CDs the New” and “Faith: the Jane Fonda Workout for Your Soul.”
The Parson Sad Icon Has my material gone stale?

The Bad Shepherd Pt. 3 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
The Parson Icon Time to bring out the big guns.
The Parson Icon Gather the troops, Timothy. Tomorrow, the Parson will croon this town back to God.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Ned Happy Icon AUUUUGHHH! PARSON, WE LOVE YOU! WHOOOOO!
The Parson Annoyed Icon Still nothing! What is with these people?
Rev. Lovejoy Smug Icon I don't mean to gloat, but I did tell you--
The Parson Annoyed Icon Saskatoon, Tim. Saskatoon.
Rev. Lovejoy Icon Shutting up now, sir.

The Bad Shepherd Pt. 4 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
The Parson Sad Icon It appears that the situation is much worse than I thought.
The Parson Icon I need to commune with the Lord in quiet contemplation.
The Parson Icon Where's the nearest golf course?

End Edit

Character Dialogue
The Parson Icon I have consulted with the Holy Spirit.
Rev. Lovejoy Icon What did he say?
The Parson Annoyed Icon Mostly complained about His clubs. He shot an 85. He's a 7 handicap, so a rough day for Him out there.

The Bad Shepherd Pt. 5 Edit

Start Edit

Character Dialogue
Rev. Lovejoy Icon So... what's the plan to win back our flock?
The Parson Icon First, I'm going to peal off in my golf cart.
Rev. Lovejoy Icon And then?
The Parson Icon I don't know, spread the Word maybe. Point is, this town gives me the creeps. You're welcome to it.

End Edit

Character Dialogue
Ralph Happy Icon Yay, a golf cart!
The Parson Icon If you'll come to church this Sunday, I'll let you drive it, son.
Ralph Icon No thank you. I worship a tree. Tree said he'll buy me a fire truck.
The Parson Annoyed Icon I hate this town...

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