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The Texan With No Shame
Texan1

Level Required

1

Number of Quests

6

Release Date

April 19, 2013

The Texan With No Shame is a quest chain featuring the Rich Texan.

QuestsEdit

Quest Requirements
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 1 Make Cletus Go to a Tea Party Rally
Make The Rich Texan Go to a Tea Party Rally
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 2 Make The Rich Texan Celebrate Cowboy Style
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 3 Make The Rich Texan Ride the Mechanical Bull
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 4 Make the Rich Texan Visit the Track
Make Mr. Burns Visit the Track
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 5 Make The Rich Texan Lobby Agenda with Mayor Quimby
The Texan With No Shame Pt. 6 Make The Rich Texan Celebrate Cowboy Style

DialogueEdit

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 1Edit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "Yee Haw!"
Cletus Icon "Always nice to see a fellow libertarian around here."
Lisa Icon "As one of our leading benefactors of government handouts, you might want to rehink your pro-Tea Party position."
The Rich Texan Icon "Nonsense, little lady! Jobless, clueless rubes like Cletus here are the lifeblood upon which the Tea Party's secret corporate backers suck. That came out wrong. I meant to say, "freedom freedom freedom freedom."

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 2Edit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "I'm bored. You know the problem with having everything? You end up needing nothing. It's horrible!"
Homer Icon "Yeah... that sounds rough. Hey, I know. You could buy a football team! Like your fellow rich Texan, Jerry Jones. Only YOUR team could win once in a while."
The Rich Texan Icon "I love it! But football stadiums are expensive. Unless you can find a city gullible enough to buy one for you..."
Homer Icon "Welcome to Springfield, football!"

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 3Edit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "I want our football stadium to have it all. The biggest scoreboard! The largest cheerleaders! The heaviest footballs! And in every corporate suite, the most violent mechanical bull money can buy!"

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 4Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "Monty, your estate is sitting right where I want to build my new football stadium. How much you want for it?"
Mr. Burns Icon "Listen up, New Money -- not everything is for sale. This is the home where my forefathers lived and murdered each other for a bigger share of the family fortune. It has sentimental value."
The Rich Texan Icon "Then how about a bet? A friendly wager between bitter enemies."
Mr. Burns Icon "A bet, eh? I wager my home, and you put up what?"
The Rich Texan Icon "My cowboy hat. It's the one Daniel Boone was born, lived, and died in. Very special."
Mr. Burns Icon "Agreed. Off to the dog track we go!"

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
Mr. Burns Icon "I win! Though the outcome was never in doubt. That dog and I went to Wharton together."

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 5Edit

StartEdit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "Why is it so hard to build a simple football stadium? Homer, I thought you said this town was ripe for the plundering."
Homer Icon "Well, it's a tough economy. There are two kinds of currency, and one of them is donuts of all things. But we do boast one the corruptest mayors this side of Uzbekistan. You should go bribe him."

EndEdit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "Mayor Quimby, you are easily bought. I admire that in a man."
Quimby Icon "You'll have your football stadium, even if I have to accept a thousand bribes to make it so!"
The Rich Texan Icon "Now all I gotta do is convince an NFL team to move here."

The Texan With No Shame Pt. 6Edit

Character Dialogue
The Rich Texan Icon "I can't convince any football teams to come to Springfield! How come no one told me you people have the lowest income in the civilized world?"
Lisa Icon "Don't forget our high crime rate, abysmal environmental track record, lousy schools, the near-constant rioting, rogue tidal waves..."
Wiggum Icon "And we arm our homeless and then proceed to taunt them. It's not a good policy."
The Rich Texan Icon "Every time I come close to sealing the deal, the team moves to Los Angeles. How many teams does that football-crazy town need?"
Homer Icon "I'm awful sorry you didn't get to realize your dream of screwing us all over. But at least you're still rich."
The Rich Texan Icon "You're right! Nothing makes you happy like money!"

TriviaEdit

  • Some players experience problems with The Rich Texan's 12 hour task 'Ride the Mechanical Bull' as once the Player has set him on the job and quit the game, he stops and starts walking around the player's Springfield again. This meant that the only way for players to progress with his quests was to pay 6 Donuts to finish the task instantly.

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